Sharing is good!

Had a much better weekend than week thats for sure! A friend from a few hours away came for a visit and helped out with out final garage sale. I made some money which is nice and the best part was that I was still able to give 6 bags of clothes and 2 bags of footwear to Goodwill. I felt great after we made the donation! Pay it forward as they say!
We also steam cleaned the carpets in the house and it just looks brighter and fresher. I love it. Maybe a part of my mood was a result of my surroundings. I do believe that. I have been in better spirits for sure. I am really looking forward to hosting the annual pool party this weekend and seeing many friends have a good time with us!
At lunch Saturday, I had a great talk with my friend from far away and it was nice to have someone express concern for me. I think I talked his ear off but it was very good to share. He could relate (he has had similar concerns of his own) and he actually listened! Many have tried to de-value the issues I have been having and have not really shown concern. It was nice to feel that and share my deep feelings with a good friend!!
In the end, my terribly low week resulted in a better weekend and a wonderful result this morning. I lost another pound from my starting weight and therefore am 3 pounds closer to my goal!! 22 more pounds to go! Walking/Running has not happened. I was extremely dizzy after my last Migun Bed treatment so I decided to not try more cardio. This week I plan on being on the Migun bed 3 times and I would like to go for 1 long walk with the dogs. My friend from far away is coming Friday for the weekend so maybe Friday evening we can take the dogs. This way I am not alone if I get dizzy and need to take a break! Looking forward to it!

This is me.....creating wellness in my life!

Sleeping a lot!

I tried....for 2 days. I keep falling asleep as soon as I get home. My energy is so low this week. Walking on the treadmill has been an impossible feat. I am going to try for 15 mins today then take a nice long bath and relax. Today has been a busy day at work and I am beat already. I still have half my day left!

I wanted to share what I did last night. I had forgotten about this tool but was happily reminded of it by an email I received. Lululemon has a Goal Tender tool that you can use to set goals. It takes you through a wonderful thought provoking process and in the end you have goals set for Health, Personal and Professional with dates and completion progress bars. You get emails as time passes and as a date approaches. It's a great tool to use. I achieved one of the goals I set so far! Become an RMT by May 2011 and I did! It was great to get that congratulations email! The hard part was reading my overall life goals. Much was written about supporting my brother through his illness and supporting his family if he doesn't make it. I suppose I had an idea that he may pass away, even though I wished that it wouldn't happen. Needless to say my emotions were high last nigh after reading that. I did update my goals and felt good after doing so.

..... I miss him like crazy. I wish things were different. I've have severals dreams of him lately. He's always on my mind.....I wish we had more time together.

Wish me luck on the treadmill kids! I'm gonna need it!

This is me...creating wellness in my life!

Feeling down......

Last week was tough. As you can tell because I didn't post once. I was avoiding it. I'm feeling tired again, sleepy to the point of not being able to stay awake at all. I was not perfect this week in taking my supplements and I think that brought me down. I felt much better on Friday when I had my B12 shot but it wasn't enough to completely change my mood and energy. I hope I will do better this week. No need to recap on my goals because I didn't progress in any of them. In fact, I gained one pound back. Frustration is at its highest right now.

Trying to find a positive in last week and I did! I maintained my adjustment through the whole week. Maybe my spine and ribs and starting to really heal and I can move to bi-weekly treatments! I'll see tomorrow when I get assessed and adjusted again.

Tonight I am going to have a 30 minute Migun Bed treatment and then have dinner. After dinner I am going to try and walk on the treadmill. I decided to do the treadmill because if I need to lay down from fatigue and dizziness I can do so in my home and not in the middle of the street. Until I can complete a full hour without issue, I will stay on the treadmill. Today's goal is to go as long as I can and then repeat that length of time each day this week. I will increase next week if I feel I am strong enough.

I feel down, unmotivated and frustrated. Tomorrow is a new day, hopefully a better day.

This is me......creating wellness in my life.

Expectations.....

I have learned that having expectations leads to disappointment so I have tried to set goals and reach for them rather than expecting something to happen or change. I suppose it's understanding the difference between visualizing an achievement versus expecting it to happen. I can visualize my goals being achieved but I cannot just expect them to happen. I have set goals and will work my best to attain them.

Yesterday was a struggle. I worked super late and had no time in the morning to plan my meals for the day. I left the house with leftover pizza and 2 Lara bars. Not super balanced but I had to make it work. The worst part was dinner, McDonalds. Really? I am very much aware of my extreme weakness to terrible food when I am starving, that is why I pre-plan meals so I won't be in that situation. Yesterday I was tested and I failed. Today I move forward with confidence that I will not repeat my mistakes by planning ahead and always being prepared.

I'd like to share where I get many of my healthy choice recipes and ideas!! I've been using this website for many years now and I love it!! Hungry Girl is a website with great healthy ideas for meals. She has taken some classic fans like the Big Mac and made it healthier!! It's a great resource so you can make your new healthy lifestyle include some wonderful and tasty foods!!! There is an option to subscribe to her emails (which I do!!) and she has many cookbooks out! They are all awesome! She also just completed her first season on the Cooking Network and is set to film more in the fall! Enjoy!!

I found out that along with my B12 shot on Thursday I also get my results from my wellness assessment! I'll share it all...the good, the bad, and the ugly. After all, it's what I need to succeed on this wellness quest!

This is me...... creating wellness in my life!

The end of one week, the beginning of the next...

This week started off well, I was feeling better. The week ended not so strong. The past three days I have felt tired and have had low energy. They said it would take some time before my deficiences levelled off and I felt better long term but when I felt so great after feeling so poorly I was disappointed that my poor feeling came back. I'm sure I'll get there but it's gonna take time. I need to be patient and allow myself to heal and become strong again.

Lets look at my goal list and get the update!!


1. Fix my nutrition (eat healthy!!) 


Had a great start with changing my nutrition. The end of the week wasn't perfect but that is life. I had two family birthday parties so food was in big quantities! I had smaller portions but I also had cake!


2. Loose 25 pounds (need to feel better!!)


The end of week one and I weighted in 2 pounds lighter! They say that loosing 1 pound  per week is the best case for weight loss so it looks like I am doing okay. Focus on the positive! Next week is a new week! 23 to go!


3. Drink 8 cups of water per day


Got up to 5 glasses a day and now I finally crave water again!! I'll be at 8 glasses a day in no time. I'll have achieved my goal once I have had 8 glasses of water per day for over 21 days!!


4. Shake this terrible survivors guilt (explanation to come)


This will be ongoing for me. I had a hard time this week with the internal panic attacks I have been having. I visualize my brother still being alive but I can't get to him and I just scream "I want my brother back" over and over. It's terrible and it's still happening. I've got a way to go with this unfortunately.


5. Improve my cardiovascular health


Gonna try walking around the block this week or on the treadmill to see what happens. WIsh me luck!


6. Run the Detroit half marathon in October 2012


Once #5 is achieved the training for this will begin!


7. Work out at least 3 times per week


Gonna try one work out this week. I have decided to cancel my Train With Jane membership and go back to Goodlife. Unfortunately the hours for TWJ are not working with my new work schedule. I'm going to start slow and hope it gets better so I can get back to weekly work outs. I really do enjoy them!!!


8. Start a family in 2012 (!!!!!!!)


Fingers crossed. We haven't started trying but I hope we do this year or early next year!


9. Bring Yoga back into my weekly routine (twice per week)


I will be joining a studio in September and will start slow. I am very excited to get back to yoga. I think it will help me with my overall health and wellness. 


10. Create overall wellness in my life (be truly happy)

  
I hope to get my plan and results this week. Then I will have a drawn out path to wellness. I will hear from Tina this week and will meet with her to review my results and have my plan set up. My neck has been feeling really great. I have been on a twice a week treatment plan as well as 2 Migun bed treatments. They have been really helping. In 6 months I will have new X-rays done and will see the results in black and white.
     
All these in total will have completed my overall wellness plan. What a great feeling that will be!!!


This is me.....creating wellness in my life!

Stress comes in all shapes and sizes....

Yes it's true, stress is not my friend lately. There is good stress but the bad stress has taken over it seems. The past two days have shown me weaknesses I still posses. I let myself get consumed with angry at two car issues this week. One of them from a leased vehicle that I turned in 8 yrs ago. I thought it was comical that they thought I should pay because a tire issue with their insurance company left them not being paid...apparently that was my issue after 8yrs. I was laughing at it until they told me I had to pay it. I told them no, of course, so we will see where this goes. The second issue is my current car, aka the lemon. I had it detailed and it came back with a broken windshield, dealer claims they didn't do it so I get to pay. Never by GM unless you want poor customer service. This has happened multiple times to me, I bring it in for service and I end up with a HUGE bill to pay from issues created from dealer staff negligence.

It's things like this that remind me of just how much work I need to do on creating a better me!

This week has been great for nutrition. I have been entering in all my foods and activity and have been under my daily caloric intake goal of 1200-1300. I cheated and checked early for my weight and I have lost 3 pounds already!!!! I hope to have the same number on Monday but it was great to see my body responding to the positive changes I have made so far!

This week I had 2 chiropractic adjustments on my back and neck. I feel great! I also had some active release done to my hands because they are hurting from massaging 12 clients a week. I have been on the Migun Bed twice this week and that has been really good for me too. It has become 30 minutes of "me" time and I love it! My supplements have been doing great for me too. I feel less cloudy and have a bit more energy. I am trying out the gym next week to see how it goes. Hopefully I can make it through a workout without passing out this time. I have to have my B12 shot today and I am super nervous about it, perhaps an NET session will help!

I have a new resource to share with you. I have been using it for a few weeks now and I really enjoy. It's for the iPhone, iPad but I think you can use it online too. My Fitness Pal is what the app is called. It allows you to enter in your food, exercise, and water intake per day. It monitors your progress and the best part is that you can scan barcodes instead of entering in all the info. I have found it very helpful. You can invite your friends to be on it and get updates from their progress as well! I strongly believe that working with a buddy is a great way to stay on top of your goals and see great progress. How wonderful would it be to celebrate achieved goals together with your buddy!! Check it out in the App Store or at My Fitness Pal Online Enjoy!

This is me....creating wellness in my life!

Out of Alignment...

Today I was in pain! I slept funny and woke up with my neck feeling really sore and my ribs feeling out of alignment. I couldn't wait to get to work so Dr. LeSage could fix me up with a chiropractic treatment.

It was supposed to be my first day on a better nutrition plan (trying on my own while I wait for my assessment results to come in and my new nutrition plan to be created) however, it didn't go well. I was short on time so I toasted a pancake that was left over from Sunday's regular breakfast menu. It wasn't the best way to start but today was grocery shopping day so we were pretty short on food. I took left over baked tilapia and whole wheat rice for lunch and baby carrots and an apple and peanut butter for snacking throughout the day. At least that part was super healthy! I snuck in some chocolate, not a lot but still had some.

After work I went shopping and set myself up on the right track for this week's nutrition plan. I brought home baked chicken and potatoes with a fresh  lite caesar salad for dinner. By the end of the day I was inline with my calorie intake of 1200-1400 cals per day. Somewhat of a success although I could have made healthier choices.

My treatment today consisted of adjustments to my cervical and thoracic spine (my ribs are in place again!!) as well as hand and wrist treatments. Starting out in massage therapy has its growing pains and my hands are sure feeling it. I hope to begin regular treatments with a fellow RMT on Fridays; we both need it.  It was a great feeling to be in alignment again, The best part of chiropractic treatments is the instant relief you feel; muscles tend to get sore the next day but that is normal. The rest of the day went very well for pain level.

It was also recommend to me that I included 2 Migun bed treatments per week as part of my treatment protocol so Mondays and Wednesdays will include a 30 minute treatment on the Migun bed. If you haven't heard of this then listen closely.....It's incredible! It combines 5 therapies into one treatment. Heat, Massage, Chiropractic, Acupressure and Acupuncture. The acupuncture point is felt with finger like pressure not needles. You rest on your back atop the Migun bed and for 15 or 30 minutes you feel rolling, heated jade stones along your spine right down to your heels. It feels wonderful. Jade stones have a healing quality and are the best conductors of heat so they feel amazing. Your muscles are stretched, your spine is realigned and the whole time you are relaxing with heat. It is detoxifying and oxygenating for blood cells which has anti-aging benefits. (love it!) The best part for me is that it has the same circulatory benefits of a 60 minute run. This is great for me since I haven't been able to get through a workout in weeks. I burned close to 600 calories in one 30 minute session. I did feel a little dizzy coming off of it today but hopefully with my PA treatment protocol I will get my B12 up and keep it there so I don't continue to feel this way each day!

If you are interested in the Migun bed there is one at  Be Well  and if you've never tried it you can have a free 15 minute session to try it out! Try it,  you'll really enjoy it.

Now off to bed to regenerate for tomorrow. I work at Active Body in the morning and then Be Well in the afternoon; it'll be a long day. 8 hours of sleep is needed for the body and I try to get at least that amount in each night!

This is me.... creating wellness in my life!

To Recap...

So I think I have now told the majority of my story; at least everything relevant to this journey. Beginning tomorrow I will share my daily successes, struggles and tools used. It's going to be tough but I know I can do it. The end prize is too great, I simply cannot fail!

To recap....

My Goals are:

1. Fix my nutrition 
2. Loose 25 pounds 
3. Drink 8 cups of water per day
4. Shake this terrible survivors guilt 
5. Improve my cardiovascular health
6. Run the Detroit half marathon in October 2012
7. Work out at least 3 times per week
8. Start a family in 2012 (!!!!!!!)
9. Bring Yoga back into my weekly routine (twice per week)
10. Create overall wellness in my life (be truly happy)


My obstacles are:


1. Pernicious Anaemia
          Causing:
                Weight gain (metabolism is affected)
                Zero endurance and stamina
                Dizziness and nausea
                Tired and sleepiness
                Numbness in my hands and feet (very minimal - just short periods of time a day)
                Rapid heart beat (sporadic and only for a few minutes at a time)
                Constant deep breaths (trying to get more oxygen to my cells - uncontrolled)
2. Loss of my cervical spinal curve
3. Survivors guilt


It seems like an impossible journey but I need to try, after all I did make a promise to someone that means a lot to me.......and I will let him rest in peace.


This is me.......creating wellness in my life!

The diagnosis...FINALLY!!!

I have been feeling unlike myself since I found out my brother was sick. When he died, it became worse for me. My energy level was low, my drive to do anything was gone. Everything changed!!

The past 4 months I have seen a decline in my health and wellness. I have been tired all the time, dizzy and light headed and have gained weight. I can't get through a workout with passing out. It is terrible. I took a few weeks off of Train with Jane and went back again on Wednesday; it was the worst I'd ever been. I got through 1/3 of the session and had to lay down on the floor for 10 minutes because I felt so ill, dizzy and nauseous. It was terrible. I wanted to cry. I used to work out 5 days a week, do cardio 6 days a week and complete 2 boot camps a week. I was at the top of my game.

Stress kills. I truly believe that. The immense stress I was under with my brother's illness and death brought me to my knees. I needed to do something. I went to my family doctor many times in the past year and a half only to hear that my symptoms are too general and there was nothing he could do for me. Frustration now built on top of the stress.

Enter Dr. Natasha at Be Well. My life saver!!! She wanted to sit down and talk about my health and see if there was any suggestions she could offer me. Once we spoke about my history and my symptoms, our friendly chat quickly became an assessment to which she ordered blood tests right away. There is was, after 1.5 years of frustrating wonder about what was wrong with me, Dr. Natasha saw it in black and white. My blood work revealed that I am severely low in B12 and Iron; Pernicious Anemia is what I have. So now I have a supplement regimen to follow with weekly B12 shots and I am on the path to recovery. I just started today so I will certainly share the changes I experience. I can't wait to feel like me again!!

Dr. Natasha is a wonderful person and holds great care and concern for her patients. If you are looking for a Naturopathic Doctor, look no more, It's Dr. Natasha! She is really booked so you may have to wait a couple of months to get in to see her but she is great and well worth the wait! She can be contacted at Be Well 519.972.9355.

Another issue I have had since my early twenties is my neck. I injured it many years ago and could not complete physiotherapy because I would get really sick. Instead of seeking alternatives I stopped and let it heal as it did. In the years that passed I tried massage, acupuncture, and chiropractic work but never really stuck to anything long enough. That is until now!!! I had X-rays down a month ago and they revealed that I lost my cervical curve.....My neck is now straight!! No wonder I have such pain and discomfort. I black out when I look into my armpit, I pull a muscle when I reach under the couch to get something...it's not fun. Dr. LeSage put me on a treatment protocol and together with Dr. Vizirakis I have been getting adjustments twice a week. I already feel better (it's been a month of treatments now) and my neck muscles are relaxing enough to show a significant difference in pain level. I'm getting my spinal scan again in another month and at the 6 month point I'll have another X-ray. It's wonderful to be on the path to recovery!!

If you are looking to have scans of your spine done come and see me at Be Well! I complete the scans for both Doctors and then they will review the findings. It's a great tool to see just how aligned you are and how tense your back muscles are.

So, can you keep up? I know I have many issues to share but what I am most excited to share is my successes!! When I achieve my list I will truly have created the best me there is and then the sky will be limitless for me!

This is me.....creating wellness in my life!

Gone to soon.....

"Don't let this affect your life, I know it will be hard, but please let me rest in peace knowing I didn't ruin your life" OFA

It was March 2009 when I found out the fate of my big brother. We had come home from a trip to Italy in January and he wasn't feeling well. Family Day he ended up in the hospital and by March we found out he was stage 4 cancer. He had cancer in his duodenum and liver and by the time he passed away it reached his lungs too. Within 8 months of finding out the worst news of lives, my big brother passed away. It was a terrible year for me. I had just lost my job to layoffs and decided to go back to school. I fought every day with desperate attempts to find a cure for my brother; I mean, there had to be something we could do. I didn't want to believe it was over and that we just had to wait.

September 2009 my nephew was born. The last of three children; a boy, a girl and then him. My brother decided to stop Chemotherapy the week before his sons birth because he wanted to know his child at least for a few months. (the Chemo and meds made him a zombie) It was a wonderful day. My brother was so happy that day, you would never had guessed he was weeks away from dying. He was happy, truly happy that day.....like he had forgotten his fate for a moment.

I took this picture that day.  I later learned it is the only family picture they have. Look at how incredible he looks! It so unfair, I wish he was here. November 7th, 2009. I was in Windsor at a craft show when I got the call. My brother's wife told me he was asking for me; it was time. I drove home faster than I had ever before. When I got there he was in bed, he could hardly move, I laid down beside him and we hugged and cried. Later that night he pulled all his strength together to come and sit with us for one last dinner, the whole family. Then the paramedics came and brought him to the hospital. He said good bye to us all. Told his three children to take care of "Mamma" and he was taken away. That night was difficult. We, basically, were all just waiting for the phone call. The next day we all went to the hospital to see him. He was glowing, he looked so healthy and happy. He knew what was to come and maybe he finally accepted it. We baptized the baby above my brother as he laid in his hospital bed. He didn't have enough energy so I held his arm up so he too could have his hand on the baby when he was blessed. Directly after that the priest blessed my brother with his final rights. It was so overwhelming that my dad passed out and I had to take him down to emergency so they could treat him. If that wasn't enough...the next day would be.

November 9th, 2009. 6 days before my brother's 40th birthday, he passed away. The nurse called to let my sister in law know that his breathing had become sporadic and slow.....that was the sign it was the end. She called me to have me come with her so I could watch the baby for her. When we got there my mom was already there; she had a dream that my brother was calling out to her so she rushed over. All three of us sat there, I held one hand, my sister in law held his other and my mom rubbed his legs. The baby was sleeping in my sister in laws arms. His breath went form one every minute to every two minutes to his last. I held my brother's hand when he took his last breath. It was the most wonderful gift I could have been given but also the worst reality I will ever know. My sister in law gave me the baby and asked me to take my mom and leave the room. They had made a promise to each other that she would be the last person to leave when he was gone. I held that baby so tight, I had to keep it together and he was my strength. When my mom finally realized what had just happened she fell to the ground screaming out his name. Here I was, baby in hand, mother on the floor crying out in agony for her son and then the worst sound I will ever hear in my life came from his room........ my sister in law's cries for the loss of her husband, the love of her life, the father of her children. I promise you that is something you never want to hear. I had to call everyone and tell them the news.

I've shared this because I want you all to understand the level of stress and change in my life during this time. This had all taken place right before my second round of term tests at school. It was a lot for one person to handle. I made it through but not without baggage. 

Survivors guilt, I know it well. Many great things are happening to me right now and I feel guilty. Why do I get to live and my brother doesn't. Is he mad at me? Should I have done more? Could I have done more? I just graduated as an RMT, received my registration number, got a job as a Chiropractic Assistant and as an RMT plus started my own RMT Mobile business. I should be happy, instead I cry because I fell maybe I don't deserve to be happy. 

Well this all took a toll on me. My 26 pounds lost from Train With Jane now became 11 pounds and everything changed. I began eating terribly and not working out like I was. I would cry after going to the gym out of guilt. It was so hard! Now I have bigger issues but we'll deal with that tomorrow. So now I looked for something to help me with my guilt. I didn't see anyone for therapy when he died so maybe that was the answer, therapy. Then I learned of something called NET Neuro Emotional Technique. Dr Rebecca LeSage was one of my teachers and she performs this technique at Be Well She helped me overcome my fear of sleeping alone in my house. (I had every light on in the house when my husband was away for business and I didn't sleep) So now I will begin treatments for my guilt and my fear of needles but that's unrelated to my story here. I will let you know how my treatments are going! I need to get passed this guilt and finally let my brother "rest in peace"

This is me......creating wellness in my life.

I've done it all!

I've been through many, okay most of the fad diets out there in my years. South Beach, Herbal Magic, Beyonce diet drink, Biggest Loser, Weight Watchers......you name it, I've tried it. They all lack one very important thing......overall wellness. I have found that the only thing that works for me is balance; balance in  life, mind, body and nutrition.

3 years ago I began a program at a private training studio in Windsor called
Train With Jane. I was at an all time high in my weight and I felt uncomfortable in my own skin. I worked hard for over a year and lost 26 pounds. I kept it off for another year. The difference was planned workouts 5x per week, an easy nutrition plan to follow and YOGA!!! All this combined created wellness in my life. Unfortunately, I would soon find out that I was still missing something............

I found an incredible program called Creating Wellness at BeWell in Windsor. This program combines every aspect of overall wellness in your life. It looks at your mind, fitness and nutrition. I had my assessment on Monday. It was easy enough; I completed a long questionnaire of about 100 questions on everything you can imagine, then completed a short questionnaire about my goals. I met with Wellness Coach Tina, who completed my assessment. I had my weight and measurements done (not my favourite part, of course), then blood pressure and body composition. The amazing part came next, a stress test! Testing me on how my mind deals with and my body reacts to stress. How could this be missed in every other plan I have put together for myself?? I am a strong believer in stress being a major cause of illness in our lives and learning how you personally deal with stress and what to do to improve that is critical to a healthy life! If I wasn't a believer before the assessment, I sure am now! I simply cannot wait for my results to come in so I can meet with Tina to review them and set up my path to wellness!!!

.........then it happened. I couldn't control it. 1.5 years ago and I still struggle....



This is me.....creating wellness in my life.

Starting at the ......... middle.

So I thought the best way to begin my story is to tell you my goals, after all they are what are driving me to creating a new and improved me... my true self. I'm going to be raw, completely open so that my story; with all it's struggles, sadness, achievements and happiness, may just inspire someone to create wellness in their life too!

Here they are:

1. Fix my nutrition (eat healthy!!)
2. Loose 25 pounds (need to feel better!!)
3. Drink 8 cups of water per day
4. Shake this terrible survivors guilt (explanation to come)
5. Improve my cardiovascular health
6. Run the Detroit half marathon in October 2012
7. Work out at least 3 times per week
8. Start a family in 2012 (!!!!!!!)
9. Bring Yoga back into my weekly routine (twice per week)
10. Create overall wellness in my life (be truly happy)

Nothing is impossible! I can achieve my goals. I just need to be focused and determined. I plan on getting a lot of help. I have decided to use many different tools to achieve these goals and I will be sharing each tool with you.....explaining each of them and giving you all the info needed so you can use these tools too! I am hoping that my blog will help me stay on track and accountable!! So now I begin, at the middle, eager for the end with all my goals achieved and new goals set!!!

Thank you for listening!

This is me.....creating wellness in my life!